crisis averted

Someone's been praying. I can feel it. A complete about face has happened. God made a way where there wasn't a way. We had a long talk (& cry) last night. Each talking about what the past couple of months has been like for us and this time we really spoke from the heart and really listened to each other. We have been under so much stress for a few months now that we chose our own individual ways of coping and leaving each other out. I told him how sometimes I want to just go to the kids at night and hold them because I'm afraid I'm not going to wake up in the morning. He said that was how he was feeling about me.....worried about me, just wanting to hold me. But holding usually leads to sex and I was so offish about sex that I wasn't letting him even touch me.

I've been like a woman on a mission. Afraid that I was running out of time. Trying to do everything I could and be totally absorbed in my kids lives. I didn't really take the time to think about what he was feeling.

In chapel today, the sermon was on forgiveness. It was an amazing teaching......and timely! He talked about how bitterness (from unforgiveness), if left alone and not taken care of, multiplies, and can form deep roots that can grow into each other and become so hard to untangle.

We're not out of the woods yet but the difference between yesterday and today is a big contrast. We spent this afternoon as a family at the horse stable for a birthday party. The kids played with friends from Liam's class and rode ponies. I took pictures for the family and we mingled with the other couples. It was a gorgeous day and was especially nice being together.

We decided that today starts a new chapter. Keep praying.....whoever you are (Ang? :-) )

*Thank you, Joy, for being there for me last night. I love ya, girl!